Trusting Jay: (A Chicago Suits Romance) (Loving Jay Book 1) Read online

  I fell in and out of sleep. Jay and Rosie always seemed to be at my side whenever I woke, day or night. Bringing me water and pills. Mopping my sweaty brow with a cool cloth. Sometimes I even ate a few crackers or a bite of banana.

  Each time I woke, I felt a little better. My head hurt a little less. My joints and muscles ached a little less. But as my physical ailments subsided, my mind became more and more unsettled.

  How did I get to Jay’s house? How long have I been here? I hadn’t really talked to either Jay or Rosie, only for utilitarian issues. I need water. I need more painkillers. I need to sleep. But now I felt a little better. I needed answers.

  Jay came in. I was sitting on the bed, happy my head no longer hurt to be upright, at least not more than it hurt lying down.

  “You’re sitting, you must be feeling a little better.” He opened the blind, and I squinted as bright sunlight flooded the room.

  “So much better than I was.”

  “Good.” He sat on the end of the bed and twisted his body to me.

  “I don’t know how to thank you.”

  “You don’t need to.” The corners of his lips moved, almost forming a smile.

  “What happened?”

  “The man drugged you. The doctor thinks with GHB because of how severe your symptoms have been. You’re lucky, it can be fatal.”

  “But how did I get here.”

  “I saw you at the club, and stopped the man.”

  “Why were you at the club?” I asked, trying to fit the puzzle pieces together.

  “I saw you there. Dancing with him. Rubbing up against him on the dance floor. The flash of red of your shoe soles as you moved.” I stared at him, disbelieving this was happening to me. “And then he took you upstairs. He was all over you, but I realized you’d been drugged. Your body was floppy and your eyes glazed.”

  “And you stopped him.”

  “Good thing I was there to protect you. God knows what he would have done to you.”

  “Yes, thank you.” Though I still didn’t understand why Jay was at the club, I would be eternally grateful for his intervention.

  “The necklace looks beautiful on you, I’m glad you decided to wear it.”

  I turned red. My hand went to the necklace, and ran my fingers down the chain until I was holding the diamond between my fingers.

  “Thank you for this too. How,” I hesitated, “How long have I been here?”

  “Three days. Do you feel up to coming downstairs? You must be sick of this room.”

  Three whole days? The news shocked me. Still, I liked the the idea of getting out of bed. The idea that I could get out of bed now that my body didn’t feel like I was on the verge of death. “I think so.”

  “Good, there’s a robe for you in the top drawer. I’ll wait for you outside.” He patted my leg, and left the room.

  I pulled myself from the bed and stretched. The muscle pain I’d felt had given over to tightness and cramps from being in bed so long.

  A selection of robes were inside the top drawer. All pale white. One silk, one terry, one cotton, one satin. Those were on the top row. There were more underneath but I didn’t want to keep Jay waiting. I grabbed the cotton one and pulled it on.

  I gripped the doorknob, ready to turn it when I paused. What would be waiting for me on the other side?

  42

  Jay was leaning against the wall, opposite the bedroom door. It was a wide curving hallway with several wooden doors and alcoves with vases of flowers. He took my hand. The contact with his skin sent the familiar spark of electricity through me. I squeezed his hand, needing reassurance.

  “Wow, your house is amazing,” I commented as we came to a large, sweeping staircase.

  He looked at me and smiled, then led me down the stairs, through a huge landing and into a living area. Georgian style windows spread across one wall, and an elegant white fireplace on the other.

  I sat on the sofa, already tired from walking the short distance, and he sat in the adjacent armchair. He stared straight into my eyes. The way he used to. I shifted in my seat.

  Rosie walked in carrying a tray with a pot of tea, a pot of coffee and some cups. Without saying anything, she placed the items on the low table and left.

  “Tea or coffee?” Jay asked. He hadn’t taken his eyes off me when Rosie came in. And now, like then, he continued to stare into me.

  “Tea, please.” I fixed my gaze on my mug, keeping my eyes away from his.

  Jay picked up the teapot and poured me a cup, then poured himself one. He then picked up my cup and passed it to me.

  “Thank you,” I said. I’ve said thank you to him so many times in the past few minutes. And I did have many things to thank him for. I could almost feel my body warm, but then I remembered the email. Not so much the photo. But the words James McAllister screaming out from the text.

  “Would you like any food?”

  “Uh, yes please. James.” I tried the name out on my tongue. He visibly flinched when I said it but quickly regained his normal composure. He took something from his pocket, a small plastic oval with three buttons on it. He pushed the blue button.

  “The blue button is for Rosie,” he said, handing it to me. “You keep this while you’re here, and she will come to you.”

  “Yes?” Rosie asked as she entered the room.

  “Abbie and I will have lunch soon, in the dining room”

  “Yes, sir.” She turned and left the room as quickly as she had entered it.

  We finished our tea and I followed him into the dining room. I gawked at the room as we entered, the table sat twenty and original artwork graced the walls.

  We talked through our meal, the easy flow of conversation still between us. I realized how famished I was after not eating for three days, and lapped up all of the chicken soup placed in front of me.

  “Did you get enough to eat?”

  “Yes, thank you.” That phrase again. Thank you for everything Jay, except for being a liar.

  “Come, you should get some rest.” He stood and without protest I followed him back to my room.

  “Where’s your room?” I asked as we approached my door.

  “Down the hall.” He didn’t indicate which way down the hall.

  I stepped into my room and he closed the door, with him on the other side.

  Tired and confused, I climbed back into bed and fell asleep.

  When I woke, my eyes blinked at the weak sunlight. I wish I knew the time, but I didn’t have my phone and couldn’t see a clock in the room. I pushed the blue button, and Rosie appeared soon after.

  “Yes?”

  “Do you know the time?”

  “It’s a little after four. Is that everything?”

  “Is it okay if I go downstairs?”

  “Of course, I’ll let Mr McAllister know.”

  Once she’d left, I got out of bed and went back to the dresser with the robes in it. I pulled the top drawer open and ran my fingers over the contrasting fabrics. With Sam’s voice in my head, I closed the drawer and opened the one underneath. It was full of underwear, bras and socks, of all fabrics and colors, all of them my size.

  I opened the next drawer down, it was full of casual tops, all my size. The drawer underneath that was full of pants. My heart raced at the sight. I shut the drawers and went to the closet, the walk in closet. Inside every rail was covered in dresses, skirts, blouses, smart pants. Every one of them my size.

  I staggered backwards, until I bumped into the closet doorframe.

  There was a soft knock at the bedroom door, and I rushed over to open it.

  “Jay.”

  “What’s wrong? Why are you so upset?”

  “The clothes here, why are all they all here?”

  “So you’d have something to wear when you felt a little better.”

  “But Jay. James. There’s enough here to wear something new every day for a year.”

  “I didn’t know what style you’d want, so I got an assortmen
t.” Assortment. Unbelievable. The hair on the back of my neck prickled. Why did he do all of that?

  “Oh, okay.”

  “Do you want to get dressed? We can watch a movie.”

  He flashed his beautiful smile at me, but more than that, his words were something to get me out of my isolation. I pushed my worries to the back of my mind. ‘I would loved to watch a movie. A romance?” I said hopefully.

  “Sure, you can pick it. I’ll wait out here for you.” He ducked back out the door and shut it behind him.

  I went back to the dresser and looked for something comfortable. Jeans and a t-shirt plus a oversized cardigan. All Gucci. Of course. I shook my head, and opened the door to find Jay waiting in the same spot as before.

  “You look beautiful.”

  “Thanks,” I said laughing. Jeans and a t-shirt after several days with no shower. Yeah, real beautiful.

  We retraced our last route, but went past the living area we’d sat in, down a long passageway and through a set of double doors. I blinked twice to make sure I wasn’t seeing things, then realized of course, someone that spends three thousand dollars on lingerie is going to have a home cinema.

  The smell of popcorn and butter smacked my lips. Rosie stood to the side at an old fashioned looking popcorn cart and scooped some of the popcorn into tubs for us.

  I turned around, looking for a place to sit. There were both sofas and high backed single seats, enough to seat twenty people. I wasn’t sure which to pick, so hung back to follow Jay’s lead. He chose a single seat, and I sat in the one beside him.

  “What movie do you want to watch? Any one you want.”

  I was going to say Gone With The Wind. Or Breakfast At Tiffany’s. But a thought struck me, and I said “Fatal Attraction.”

  He looked away from me, his head angled up, before turning back. “Okay.”

  The movie reflected my anger. And hurt. Being lied to, then lied to again. But when she got that kitchen knife, I realized it was Matt I was so angry at. Matt had caused my hurt and pain. Matt had broken me, not Jay. Jay had saved me.

  I shook my head. Jay had saved me. But he also hurt me. He also lied. But he saved me. I’m in his house. He doesn’t want money from me. He doesn’t seem to want anything from me. I’ve been here days and he’s done nothing but take care of me.

  I became lost in my thoughts and didn’t see the rest of the movie. Why does my heart want Jay when my brain knows better?

  After the movie, we returned to the dining room for dinner. My body was still in need of restoration, and I ate all of my roast chicken with mashed potatoes and vegetables.

  “You look tired,” Jay said from across the table.

  “I am exhausted.

  “That’s normal, the doctor said to expect that.”

  I smile at him. At all he’s done for me. Was it enough to make up for the lie? I don’t know. After all, Jenny did say his motivation for lying was different from Matt’s, and understandable.

  “I think I’m going to go to bed.”

  “Of course. I’ll walk you up.”

  He took my hand, and I followed him back to my room. He let go of my hand and opened the door. I looked at him, my heart fluttering the way it had on that first night after D’Angelo’s.

  I searched his eyes, looking for a clue. Something, anything of what he was thinking. I only saw warmth.

  “Good night,” he said, and kissed my forehead.

  In the morning I felt much better again. Almost normal. Almost. I got out of bed and had a shower. Washed the days of filth off of me. The water cleared my head as I held the diamond pendent in my fingers.

  Jay was so easy to spend time with. His touch was electric. And he saved me. His behavior during my time here had been nothing but that of a good old fashioned gentleman.

  But he lied. Maybe if I could make him understand how Matt hurt me, I could understand the reason he lied.

  I tied my wet hair back, pulled on another Gucci jeans and t-shirt outfit, and went searching for Jay.

  “Abbie, you’re up. I hope that means you’re feeling better.”

  “Yes, thank you. I’m feeling a little more normal.”

  He came over to me and clasped my hands in his. He looked straight into my eyes, and said “Stop thanking me.” I blushed. I had so much to thank him for.

  I took a deep breath. “Can we talk?”

  “Of course, come with me to the breakfast room and Rosie will get us some coffee.”

  43

  “I’m really grateful for everything you’ve done for me,” I began after a drink of coffee. The words faltered, but I was determined to get them out. “Matt hurt me really badly. He lied to me. About who he was.”

  Jay didn’t move. I continued, “He lied about who he was, and you did the same. Well, lied about who you were. But Jenny, she’s right, she said your motivations for lying were different. Matt. He…”

  “You don’t have to tell me what Matt did to you.”

  “But I want to. I need to.”

  “My parents died when I was seventeen. I used the inheritance to pay for my education and buy my condo outright. It was supposed to set me up, to make my life easier. Then I met Matt.” I stared into my coffee cup. Embarrassed at what I had to say.

  “When I met him, he was studying to become a doctor. He was struggling to pay his bills, I asked him to move in with me so he didn’t have to spend money on rent. Then after a while he was going to get kicked out for not being able to pay his tuition that year. So I took out a mortgage and gave him the money to pay his tuition arrears.” I looked up, Jay was shaking his head. His fists balled so tight his knuckles were white.

  “Before I knew it, I had a mortgage so large I could barely afford it. I couldn’t afford it. I mean, I can’t afford it.” Jay’s fist pounded the table, causing me to jump. I gulped and look at Jay, his nostrils were flaring.

  I continued, my voice shaky, “One day Marla went to meet a new client about hiring for their finance department. It was a call centre operation. As she walked up to the entrance, Matt was there. The whole thing was a lie. He wasn’t studying medicine. He was selling solar panels over the phone. He wasn’t studying to be a doctor.” Jay picked up his mug and hurled it against the wall, shattering it to pieces. Coffee spattered across the paint. I jumped, and tears welled in my eyes.

  He came over and stood beside my chair. He cradled my head against his frame, and the tears flowed in earnest. Shaking, he pulled me to stand and embraced me. My head moved with his shallow breaths.

  After a time, his breath calmed, and he said, “I’m sorry he did that to you.”

  My initial shame gone, I felt much better. Relieved. Like maybe Jay understood me better. Understood why it was so crucial to be able to trust him. I wrapped my arms around him and pulled myself closer to him. Close enough to flatten myself as I melted into him.

  “Thank you,” I said, then kicked myself. Stop saying thank you.

  Jay tilted my chin up to meet his eyes. He wiped my tears, and said “If there’s one thing I can promise you in life, it’s that I’m nothing like him. Nothing. Matt and I could not be more different.”

  I gave a little nod and lean back into his chest. All I wanted to do was close my eyes and be safe. Safe in his arms. James’ arms. We stayed like that some time, before sitting back down and finishing our breakfast, the coffee soaked wall beside us.

  “I have a meeting I can’t get out of, I’m taking it from my home office so we can have lunch together. But in the meantime, make yourself at home. Rosie will see to all your needs.”

  “Okay,” I said, disappointed.

  I plodded aimlessly around the never-ending house. Through room after room, some formal some casual. I needed to think things over, I couldn’t deny my feelings any longer. Couldn’t deny his reasons for lying made sense. It was just, hard. Hard to forget everything.

  Jenny would reassure me. I made my way back to my room to find my phone, but couldn’t. I buzzed Rosie. />
  “Yes?” she said.

  “Do you know where my phone is?”

  “No, sorry.”

  “Can you ask Jay, James for me?”

  “I’ll get him.”

  After she left I stood in the closet, examining all the amazing dresses. Jenny would go nuts at them. I stopped at one that stood out a short, tight red satin dress with a plunging neckline and back. I will be wearing that to dinner and see where it leads me.

  “Abbie?” Jay said from my bedroom door.

  “Thanks for coming,” stop saying thanks, “Sorry for interrupting, I can’t find my phone, do you know where it is?”

  “It was lost at the club, but I will get you another one.”

  “Oh,” that really sucks. “Thank you.” I groaned at myself.

  “Anything else?”

  I shrugged my shoulders. “Nope.”

  “I have couple more hours of work to do before lunch. I'll show you how to work the cinema and you can watch a movie.”

  “Sounds great,” I said smiling. I’m always up for watching a movie.

  He showed me how to work the apps and how to open the automated curtains, then I settled in to watch The African Queen. I’d seen it so many times I could recite most of the lines by heart.

  Cary Grant and Katherine Hepburn bickered away, but I didn’t hear a word of it. I’d drifted into a trance of Jay. His trance.

  Silence snapped me back to reality when the credits finished rolling. I put another movie on. Funny Girl. Figured I needed a laugh.

  And I did laugh. My mind wandered to the photo in the email and smiled. That afternoon was amazing. The things he did to my body, and the way he’d made me feel were nothing short of incredible.

  The movie ended, and I realized how hungry I was. It must be well after lunch, I’m surprised Jay didn’t come looking for me.

  After a couple of wrong turns, I found the breakfast room. All trace of coffee was gone from the wall, and the broken shards of mug had been cleared away. No one was there, so I pushed the blue button.